okay, time for another long post...

okay, so today, reminded me, of the reasons that i hate my mom... many people use the word hate, jokingly, i dont in this matter, i use it towards her seriously... i wish i had a real mom, i saw someone lastnight out with the entire family... it must be nice, spending time with the entire family, rents and all the kids... stuff like that makes me sad... i cant remember the last time my mom even told me good job, or thanks for something... y is it that i hide from peopele bhind a fake smile??? is it not to show them how im feeling, or just cuz i think its pitiful that i myself am sad?... oh well...

so, i wonder what most people think of life, if its a joke, thats how most people treat it to be... i can think of a few that do that... i try to take it seriously, but sometimes, its hard not to have fun, but when that happens, it fucks me over... so everyone that reads this, i would ask u to please leave a comment and tell me what u think of it as...

so, i havent been up to much lately... i never got round to going out today, i was busy all day, eitehr lawn work, or my moms slave bitch...

something i miss, is being with my family... i seriosuly do, i mean i hate my mom, but i cant stand but love her... its hard not too... my dad is awesome... but lately i have found myself wanting to spend time with each of them, doing something we all enjoy... but when i try to spend time with my mom, the only words i usually hear is"Leave me alone" or "Get the fuck out of my office"... shes been super pissy lately... i try to cheer her up, doesnt work... its why im never home, and when im here, they bitch, when im not, they bnitch that im never home, they asked me lastnight why im never home, i told her because i hate being round her... i do... my dad is cool, love spending time with him, but my mom, all she ever does is just bitch...all the time... well, im kinda gettin sick of being home right now, so i think im gonna go on a walk or something... idk, prolly just sit outside on my tramppoline like i usually do...

goodnight sleeptight sweetdreams everyone, angels watch over yah...