made another song...

Here,
the moment of truth
It comes in the air
It's always the same,
it's so insane.
You cover your eyes
you fall inside
before it begins it's over.
Crash,
Crash,
out of control
Lose yourself
Go and even the score
Crash,
Crash,
out of control
Try and start a riot
now you're beggin' for more
They say the city is safe,
the keepers of faith,
the bullet is safe for one and day
Eclipsed by the one
Don't bother to run
The target is on your back
You're done.
Crash,
Crash,
out of control.
Feed the source,
come join in the war.
Crash,
Crash,
out of control.
Take it,
break it
a million or more.
We're outta control
Crash,
Crash,
Out of control
Feed the source,
come join in the war.
Crash,
Crash,
out of control
Take it
break it
A million or more.

dont know what to call it, none got ne ideas??? if so, just comment... id appreciate it...

I drew this, took me 4 days, but i like it...

here they are folks...

the before(beautiful)



and after(horrid)



but since then, all stitches have been removed, and it isnt all bloody nemore...

since today, idk why, but i feel better about something...

hmmm...

im gonna be ok
im gonna be ok
im gonna be ok
youre gonna be ok
youre gonna be ok
youre gonna be ok
were gonna be ok
were gonna be ok
were gonna be ok

its wierd cuz stuff happens, and u dont really notice it while its happening, life is sort of passing by, but when it does, it comes like fire, it burns, and hurts.. but deep inside, u still want to hold it, hold it tight enough that noone can take it away.

as of lately...

well, as of lately, havent been doing much... hung out with Christa lastnight, well friday, then saturday, i went to Ed and Phil's after hanging with Luke and Hosley for a lil... that was refreshing... then ran into Katie and Orry... rest of my night was uneventful for the most part, but i did go up to Christa's while she was babysitting the spic... Naya was there, so we were all talking... apparently Naya is going to punxy with Christa, haha, that should be fun... but she is leaving later today... i dont really feel like going to bed... noone is online to talk to, but thats otay... it means i can sit here and think, got lots on my mind... watching South Park the movie, and listening to NOFX-Anarchy Camp, my favorite song by them... earlier at Christa's, i gave myself horseshoes up my arm, and on the tops of my hands(for those of you who dont know, a horseshoe is when u take a lighter, keep it lit forever, then set the metal on ur body, it leaves a horseshow shape... only one on my arm had raised, out of 5 haha, and the one on the top of my right hand... so, im gonna redo the rows up my arms, and the top of my left arm... it doesnt burn, just tell urself it doesnt, and it feels cold... amazing... it feels quite nice... SHIT I MISSED THE BEST PART OF THE MOVIE!!! DAMNIT!!! i dont think ill go to bed... just sit up and play some games maybe... that sounds nice... now my nose plug is starting to bother me... but, this post has been long enough...

Oh, and by the way, i was serious when i said that i would take all your pain to make you happy, even if i had to deal with the burden, as long as your happy.


"Never play your lifes last note"-ME!!! i thought of that shit, neat huh??? i am smart...

Goodnight sleep... wait... nvm that... Good Morning everyone...

im going to get another soda...

Lifeless

Living this life of a lie
Holding the blade down to the skin
Going through youre memories
Deciding if this is what you want to be
Tell me now
Are you happy with what youve become
Not knowing what you are
Not knowing what to do
Not believing in what you see
Are you sure this is what you want to be
Not sure of yourself
Not knowing what to think
In your Life of a lie
Living a life of a lie
No emotions
No key to unlock the doors
Always wanting your needs to be
The things you see
Never noticing
The pain inside
It always tears you down
And all you want to do
Is bring the blade to your skin



This is the final edit of this song, no more will be added, for once, i think its good

dont thank me for being a genius at making this shit... haha

Lifeless

This is meant towards noone, so dont take it out of context


Living in this life of a lie
Holding the balde down to the skin
Going throguh your memories
Bringing tears to your eyes
Deciding if this is what u want to be
Tell me now
Are you happy with what you've become
Not knowing what you are
Not knowing what to do
Not believing what you see
Are you sure this is what you want to be
Never knowing what to think
Not sure of yourself
In your life of a lie

Happiest dates of my life

July 2nd, 2005
September 17th, 2005

those are only something one person will understand, thats if they read this.

<3

that feeling, wanting to fall asleep, dream in a world where everything is perfect for others, not myself, just them, as long as they are happy, im happy. i wouldnt want to wake up, ever.

I don't want to hurt, I don't want to hurt you, I'll make the pain go away, no matter what it takes.

damnit

well, this post is completely pointless, except the fact to always remind myself that i have VERY low confidence, in everything...

thats it...

goodnight everyone

hmmm

so, i took my meds right... they make me feel funny... teehee... that sounds funny

º¿ºx <------ no more ear...

that sucks... but yah...
got something on my mind... nothing to be shared...

how many would it take, how many would do it... is it not enough? or is it too much... will it kill me??? no, it cant...

been kinda super happy, with a spot of downness lately... that downness is like the loser in the corner, noone pays attention to... fuck it, doesnt matter... who cares? i know i dont...

my ear hurts... but i can ignore it...

im gettin use to baths... they are quite enjoyable...

havent had a smoke in a while... just dont want one... dont need em...

i know something i do need though <3...

but thats a whole long story... too long to be described on here... so many words haha... big words, long words, short words, 1-letter words, and 2-part words haha... sooo many...

so, im almost out of rootbeer... been drinking it like all day haha...

i got chopsticks sittin here by me... they just sit there... idk how they even got there...

i been typing alot here... i got fast at typing...

been playing alot of games lately... havent done that in awhile, it was relieveing...

i really think i should get going to bed...

night night everyone, sleeptight sweetdreams angels watch over yah...

WAAAAHHHH!!!!

well, this is something that is worth crying over... my ear... is gone... they cut the lil ficker off... the piece they cut off they wouldnt let me keep, bastards, but i named it Pedrico... i name alot of stuff that... good name it is... neways... i got GREAT pills for it... hydrocodone... and i got today off... and yestarday... my parents arent home right now, my Grandfather is, but he aint feeling good, so i gotta go check in on him every no and then... UTI, again... just me and my bro really... ive been bored as shit lately... haha... it sucks...but one neat thing is, it means i can play my music as loud as i want, and game as much as i want... haha... but i gotta get going...

Later everybody

<3