Have you ever fallen and felt like not getting up,
that's how I feel right now.

fuck it

halo

well, im a fucked up person
MAIN REASON BEING: i started thinking that i think too much, contradicting yes, but then i start thinkin of why i think so much and then persist to worry myself on those subjects, yes, i know, im a dumbass... but idk...

lastnight was pretty cool...
it consisted of:
Tylie = )
180 mgs of DXM
cosmic bowling
met a new person
lotsa driving at night = )
and a lonely ride home = (

but i got to see her again...

then today she called...
she said i was acting different...
arrising the question if im still good ol'e charlie
or someone new
idk, i dont care to know either,
kinda happy with the way i am meow...
worrieless...
but that can be a bad thing,
but who knows...

i just need to stop thinkin on thigns soo much...
but she said i was different in a bad way *sigh*
the one person i want acceptance from says im badly different...
fuck it...

MAYBE, just maybe i should turn into someone that doesnt let others in, just the ones i know and trust, but that would make me a dickhead, and mean ppl suck... who likes mean people, NOONE, especially me, then id be a self hater haha...
who knows...
things will work out as they are to...

toodle loo everyone

fuck.

well, never like fighting, dont like being around people that are fighting, dont like noisy kids, dont like people being to close... all these things, happening at once, especially with not being able to leave, fuckin pisses me off... but then i think of her, haha, god im corny... idk, it cheers me up, but then i start missing her... then the screaming starts to come back in... some babbling bout not being perfect enough, then arguements, i have no clue... could care less... feel like goin on a wal, have a smoke or five haha... i still laugh, not only at my misery, but im still, idk... things are just fucked sometimes in life, but yah have to just look beyond that, hope for the good things... hard for me to do that... will though neways... fuck it... im gona for the night...

toodle loo everyone...

and whoever "my secret admirer" is, could yah let me know, kinda creepy and entertaining at the same time...

well, hmph...

Myspace is pissing me off, so i figured id post on here for once... hmm... alot of stuff on my mind lately... those few words... they float round my head alot... if you care about someone, u should tell them the way u feel right??? i do that, and everytime, it seems to come back at me and fuck me over... or the other person... but this, this is different... im willing to take more than a chance on this one... id go as far as it takes... just to see her even... it just brightens up my day...

god i sound like an idiot...

but idk... this has all been on my mind, and this is a way to get it off my mind, even though it will still be there no matter what...

other news... this weekend, alot of ppl questioned me why i was soo quiet today... well, all that above, i had on my mind... and it isnt making me sad or down, but just puts me into a state that when i think of it, idk, im just overcome with happiness...

This weekend...
where to start...
Starts off they pick me up at Sheetz... here in coudy, from there we left and went to port, or so i thought, we ended up goin to like fuckin Johnsonburgh... and on the drive over, i decided i would call my mom and tell her that the car broke down that was my ride home... so i called, and dad answered... it all worked out fine... so, we then went to walkmart to get fuses for the jeep... get back, and go in, grab a blanket, and a bottle, and go to port... on the way, all of us except JD cuz he was driving, were drinking, some of the best stuff i have ever tasted... then, we get to port to this house... and there, like as soon as i got there, i have a drink in my hand... but the cops only showed up twice and each time, they didnt come in, so, we were all good... but right now, im talkin to her on the phone and she said that somebody lost 50 dollars so they called the cops... and ended up tellin them everyone that was at the party was drinkin and told them all the names... but they didnt know mine... so im good with that... but spent the night there at the house... actually got to lay next to her and sleep for once... it was wonderful... went home the next day... started missin her even before they dropped me off... but overall, great time...

well im tired, and im goin to bed...

i hope this works out...

night night everyone...

neato lil thinger i found

Follow the steps at the end, this is pretty creepy!>
1) New York City has 11 letters
2) Afghanistan has 11 letters.
3) Ramsin Yuseb (The terrorist who threatened to destroy the TwinTowers in 1993) has 11 letters.
4) George W Bush has 11 letters.
This could be a mere coincidence, but this gets more interesting:
1) New York is the 11th state.
2) The first plane crashing against the Twin Towers was flight number11.
3) Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11
4) Flight 77 which also hit Twin Towers, was carrying 65 passengers.6+5 = 11
5) The tragedy was on September 11, or 9/11 as it is now known. 9 + 1+ 1 = 11
6) The date is equal to the US emergency services telephone number 911.9 + 1 + 1 = 11.
Sheer coincidence..?! Read on and make up your own mind:
1) The total number of victims inside all the hi-jacked planes was 254. >2 + 5 + 4 = 11.
2) September 11 is day number 254 of the calendar year.Again 2 + 5 + 4 = 11.
3) The Madrid bombing took place on 3/11/2004. 3 + 1 + 1 + 2 + 4 = 11.
4) The tragedy of Madrid happened 911 days after the Twin Towersincident.
>Sheer coincidence..?! Read on and make up your own mind:>
4) The tragedy of Madrid happened 911 days after the Twin Towers incident.>>
Now this is where things get totally eerie:>>
The most recognised symbol for the US, after the Stars & Stripes, is the Eagle. The following verse is taken from the Quran, the Islamic>holy book:>
"For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. he wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah and lo, while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced: for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah and there was peace."
>>That verse is number 9.11 of the Quran.>>
Still uncovinced about all of this..?!
Try this and see how you feel afterwards, it made my hair stand on end:>>Open Microsoft Word and do the following:>>
1. Type in capitals Q33 NY. This is the flight number of the first plane to hit one of the Twin Towers.>>
2. Highlight the Q33 NY.>>
3. Change the font size to 48.>>4. Change the actual font to the WINGDINGS


OH and not that ne of u guys actually care, but im happy as i could ever be... most know why...

the true warm fuzzy feeling

well, shit lately, been confusing, lot on my mind...
but tonight, someone told me something, it means more than what they may think it means to me... but i greatly appreciated it... more than ive ever appreciated nething else... a special kind thing to me...
it seemed to clear my head up alot...

night everybody